It’s not april fools yet
Subscription-based, AI-Focused
“Hey team, so how can we make a worse Windows 11?” - Microslop
will be a modular and AI-focused OS
Take all the parts that used to be included and put them behind individual pay walls. I suggest Control Panel, powershell, network access, adding icons to start menu and task bar, using multiple monitors, the registry, right click menus. I’m sure even more could be added to this list with each starting at $5/mo, on top of the access fee and one drive expansions as access to your own hdd (other than the OS) is restricted behind a $20/mo sub.
Can I get my bonus now? - Microslop team
“Hi there User! It looks like you’re trying to ctrl-alt-delete. Unfortunately this is an al a carte feature for Premium Tier Users only. Upgrade now and get a totally free trial of right-click for one month on us!”
Oops! You hit your CTRL+ALT+DELETE quota for the week, would you like extra usage? ($5 minimum, no refunds, rates may increase after you accept charges)
Windows 12 could be released as early as this year and will be a modular OS, meaning users will have the option to add or remove features, aiming to provide more flexibility.
Does this mean I can remove the AI? /s
It is possible with W11 to install without copilot and other garbage using the right unattended setup XML and installer that facilitates it
Does that prevent Windows just ninja installing it in a random update?
I hope not but really IDK
No. You can remove anything except Edge and AI.
You will be constantly reminded that Edge is based in the same technology as Chrome though
Allegedly an incorrect rumor.
Yeah I trust Windows Central more than whatever this site is.
It’s honestly impressive how many unattractive “features” they’re apparently packing into this.
Unfortunately, these are the only bright sides to this new OS. Microsoft’s Copilot, the AI assistant the company has been aggressively injecting across the ecosystem, will now be a core part of the next Windows iteration rather than a supplementary feature.
11 is bad enough, but it seems like 12 will be infected with copilot at every level of the OS rather than just shoehorned into every single app.
These AI features won’t come cheaply, with Windows 12 set to debut a new hardware requirement just as its predecessor did with the TPM 2.0 requirement. This time around, a dedicated NPU would be required, a specialized processor designed to handle AI tasks.
Oh, great. Yet another new hardware requirement, this time for unwanted AI, in a marketplace with runaway hardware prices caused by AI. On the plus side, this will make it easier for most people to not switch.
Some features of Windows 11 might also be locked away behind a subscription model that are expected to be “advanced AI services”, but the core OS will be a one-time purchase only.
Ok, so not only are you charging money for the OS, you’re also taking away existing features and making people pay a subscription?
The modular aspect of the OS is Microsoft’s CorePC architecture project that they’ve been working on for years. It will redefine the Windows experience by allowing the addition and removal of components. This will help customise the OS for each build, whether it’s a lighter-weight system, a gaming-prioritized build, etc.
Can we remove copilot, the subscription model, advertisements, and spyware?
This time around, a dedicated NPU would be required, a specialized processor designed to handle AI tasks.
Releasing an OS that requires an NPU when Intel and AMD are only this year starting to ship desktop CPUs that even have an NPU seems very aggressive.
Doubly so factoring in it’s right now at a time when, hardware costs are skyrocketing. Getting a PC with the same specs as the one I bought in 2023, is almost double the price today. Even steam machines and consoles are delaying themselves because they can’t find a way to release at a reasonable price point.
Everyone has basically been told “3 months ago was the last time to buy a computer for a while until either the AI bubble pops, or some magical huge increase in manufacturing happens to keep up with demand”. Point is this is literally the worse time in history to tell people to go buy a new PC.
Windows 12 Reportedly Set for Release This Year as a Fully Shitty, Shit-Based, Shit-Focused Slop.
Windows Slop Edition
Windows
SlopEdition.
Microslop (through tears): Stop calling us Microslop!
Also Microslop:
They’re just trolling now. Nobody is that tone deaf.
Hahahahaha, they just don’t want to learn do they.
They’re hoping for the every other release is half decent trend they have been following since win95
Super glad to have gotten off that shit-train last year. Still dealing with the Linux learning curve, but never going back.
Every time I have to use my work laptop (with Windows) for anything, it feels like a giant step back. Lately it’s even worse; it feels like that step is right into some dog shit.
This might legitimately be the year of the Linux desktop, not because Linux suddenly got better, but because Windows finally got unacceptably bad.
I’ve just deployed bunch of win10-iot devices in an engineering workshop with write protection. Those are supported until 2032 so we’re good.
Gonna continue running linux at home, tho. In the office, because of autodesk, we’re gonna have to have something windows.
Fuck autodesk
This headline describes the disastrous state of Microslop perfectly. It gets worse with every written word.
Microslop Trough
So this is my understanding:
- Microsoft is moving to a subscription model OS
- new tpm requirement
- hardware is sold out and/or 3x more expensive because of Sam Altman
- Microsoft is leaning into thin clients
I see people celebrating this “stupid decision” by Microsoft and saying that it’s the year of the Linux desktop. Honestly, I’d love that outcome.
But what if Microsoft is willing to destroy Windows right before the AI bubble pops, shift the entire industry away from consumer parts, get people to throw all their old devices in a landfill, and then recoup their losses when Trump inevitably bails out the industry?
I always think about how Obama’s Cash for Clunkers got people to trade in their old, reliable cars for arguably shittier new cars with built-in Surveillance capabilities and planned obsolescence. It ended up ruining the used car market too. I wonder if we will see something like that for AI. “Trade in your pc for a free year of windows 12 and a new pc (thin client) to run it”
As we thought it couldn’t get any worse.
